My kids have been absolutely wonderful to me since I had this stroke. I have talked with Henry every week. Paco has called repeatedly. I spoke with Sarah three times today–she is driving her daughter to Disney World. I don’t think I would have gotten through this thing in one piece were it not for my kids.

My friends have been wonderful, too. Dusty has called to check in on me. Paul called me the day after he returned from Brazil. Lone Heron has called almost every week.

inherited rageLone Heron–a pseudonym–I have learned so much from her and her experience as a parricide growing up. I have learned so much from her book Inherited Rage. I have concluded that parricides are a breed apart, situationally defined, no danger to me nor to society, and that our best bet is to convince a prosecutor that the “typical” parricide should not be treated as a criminal and punished, but treated with compassion.

You really should buy and read her book. It is available as an e-book and quite inexpensive–only $8.99. Review: “This book is hard to put down once you start reading it. You read it in shock realizing it is actually happening to someone, while at the same time realizing that this kind of story/life does happen in our society, yet it is hidden from so many of us. This book is an eye opener and should be read by everyone.”

Yesterday Lone Heron called to say that the profits from Inherited Rage are being sent to Estrella Vista. This is a surprising but welcome development. Thank-you to Lone Heron.

My main “work” since the stroke has been sleeping, and I have come to the conclusion that the dreams which have come have a healing power of their own. Yesterday, for instance, I dreamed of being in a complex of interlocking lobbies and hallways–there seemed to be no way out, but I never gave up. In the end I did escape. To dream of being in a lobby represents your preoccupation with waiting for the next step or phase. The conclusion I have drawn from this dream is that I must be patient for the next phase to come.

I have my friends and family in the meantime. Time is illusory.


14 Responses to “patience”

  1. 1 Gloria
    March 2, 2013 at 4:03 pm

    Good to hear from you Dan and that you are having so much support from your loved ones. You deserves all the best.

    I don’t know if you have heard about this case but a 10 year old was found guilty of killing his father and he is facing jail right now until 23 years of age. Still has not been sentenced but they are discussing right now where to send the child.

    I do agree with you, cases like this one should not be treated as a criminal and punished, but treated with compassion.

    Seems to be the prosecutor in this case wants to go for punishment rather than truly help the child. Really sad story. Happened in California.

    Sentencing for California boy who killed neo-Nazi dad at age 10 postponed


    • 2 Frank Manning
      March 2, 2013 at 10:50 pm

      Gloria, please re-read the articles about this California case. The boy has been adjudicated in juvenile court. He was not tried as an adult and is not facing adult prison. The sort of juvenile facility he would be placed in focuses on rehabilitation of the child, not punishment of the criminal. To this unrelenting advocate for juvenile justice reform it does seem that the prosecutors have actually handled this case appropriately–for a change. Confinement to age 23 is the MAXIMUM the boy can be held. He very well may not get such a long confinement.

      Dan, I’m familiar with Lone Heron’s case. I totally agree that the “typical parricide” is not a crime but rather a desperate act of self-preservation.

      • 3 Gloria
        March 3, 2013 at 2:48 am

        Frank I know the case is been handled in juvenile court, never said otherwise. If you read the last article the prosecutors wants to put the kid in a juvenile detention center rather in a facility with more opportunity for mental health treatment, and that such a program might see him released sooner. however if he is put in a lockdown facility run by the Department of Juvenile Justice, he would be the youngest child in custody and he would likely remain until age 23. But we will see in the end (probably by 15 of april) what “kind” of help they will offer this child, And how long will be his sentence.


        quoted:Prosecutors say they want him sent to a lockdown facility to protect the public.

        The judge rejected a request by county mental health for an MRI on Hall, saying the court would not pay for the procedure. Defense attorneys said they would seek to have the MRI conducted and paid for through other means.

  2. 4 Gloria
    March 3, 2013 at 7:08 am

    Causes and Effects of Child Abuse


    Quoted from the link: “In silent obedience I went to Henry’s closet and picked the softest, most worn belt I could find. It was weird. I do not know why I took the time to make a choice. It did not matter. I knew for a fact they all hurt like hell. I had tried almost all of them at one point or another.

    I delivered the belt to Mama, and then took my beating through clenched teeth. When I could stand no more, I broke down crying. Mama told me to shut up; whining would not make it any better. To prove her point, she hit me several more times before sending me to my room. That sort of thing happened quite a bit before I figured out that Mama did not share, and borrowing was the same thing as stealing in her book.”

    (Page 54)

    “Mama continued her voice solid and stern. “You will not come out of this bathroom until you have written that sentence a thousand times. You will print and number each one of them neatly. I want to be able to read every word. For every mistake you make you will owe me ten more sentences.” With that assignment, she turned and left, locking me in the small windowless bathroom.

    (Page 52)

  3. 6 Gloria
    March 3, 2013 at 7:15 am

    Bullies By:Lone Heron

    quoted by the link:Have you ever noticed how bullies often seem to be angry people and how they like to pick on the underdogs until eventually one of two things happens: either the underdog disappears or he explodes and conquer the bully.

    If the underdog can avoid the bully he will, but if he can’t he gets his ass kicked till he figures how to fight back, which is often pure survival instinct.

    Parricide kids grow up with bullies. I believe that bullies are produced because somewhere along the way they made a choice: stop being the underdog and become the bully. The hardass. The dominant being. Having played both roles I can tell you neither is enjoyable but if there are only two choices I will dominate before I surrender to another’s domination. My preference, however, would be to operate on a level of communication and cooperation.


  4. 7 john
    March 8, 2013 at 9:06 am

    Paul Gingerich is going back to juvenile court. Hooray!

  5. 9 Gloria
    March 9, 2013 at 12:58 am

    Good news, State’s top court refused to hear his case. Paul will now have a second chance to be tried as a juvenile. And I truly hope Henry is sent definetely to juvenile. Really good news!

    New hearing ordered for boy convicted of Cromwell murder

    quoted: A northern Indiana boy convicted in adult court at age 12 in the killing of a friend’s stepfather will get a second chance to be tried in juvenile court after the state’s top court refused to hear his case.

    A Kosciusko County court sentenced Paul Henry Gingerich in 2010 to 25 years in prison, saying he and two other boys conspired to fatally shoot 49-year-old Phillip Danner in a plot to run away to Arizona.

    In December, the Indiana Court of Appeals threw out Gingerich’s guilty plea and sentence, saying a juvenile court judge rushed when he waived the case to adult court. The appellate court ordered a new hearing to determine if Gingerich should be retried in a juvenile court.

    The Indiana attorney general’s office appealed to the Supreme Court, arguing Gingerich had signed a plea agreement and waived his right to appeal his conviction. On Thursday, the state Supreme Court upheld the appellate court’s decision.

    Gingerich’s attorney, Monica Foster, said Gingerich phoned her from prison Friday.

    “He’s a very, very quiet kid, but he was very happy,” she said.


  6. 10 Frank Manning
    March 9, 2013 at 2:06 am

    Yes, the Indiana Supreme Court’s unanimous decision is wonderful news. So now it goes back to the Kosciusko County juvenile court, which may waive him to adult court as before. We hope Monica Foster will demand and get a different judge, as the vindictive incompetent asshole who presided over Paul Henry’s railroading is unfit to operate a mock court in an unaccedited diploma mill. We must make the prosecutors and judge in the new hearing painfully aware that the eyes of the world are on them, and they will be held accountable for any coercive or underhanded actions they might think to perpetrate. I have full faith and confidence that Monica Foster will fight like a rabid wolverine for Paul Henry.

  7. 11 Wolfgang
    March 9, 2013 at 8:50 am

    The second best News in his case. Thanks to Dan and Monica Foster to make it possible

  8. 12 john
    March 9, 2013 at 1:31 pm

    What might best we do to support Paul Henry?

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